each time i close my eyes
thoughts from my past come screaming back
each kiss
each touch
my skin crawls
who am i?
surely this wasn't me
surely not
it couldn't be?
oh yes it was
between each filthy set of sheets
twas i, the whore of Babylon
no, better yet, the devil's concubine!
my lust
my greed
never satisfied
i dare not even blink for the sight of writhing bodies
i can still feel their warm, wet flesh on my lips
the taste of them
my stomach churns
i beg of it to purge my guilt
but no, nothing
just torturous nausea
each burning penetrating stare
i feel on my person all at once
as though i were once again naked
at their command
i remember the cross
silvery and cool
upon my chest where it landed
the searing sting of my tears
as they fell
the tiny pattering as they landed in my hair
and the profound, screaming silence that followed.
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